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Real members of MyLupusTeam have posted questions and answers that support our community guidelines, and should not be taken as medical advice. Looking for the latest medically reviewed content by doctors and experts? Visit our resource section.

How Do I Manage My Wife Being Here But Not Being Here?

How Do I Manage My Wife Being Here But Not Being Here?

I feel like I’m locked in a very dark very far away place. No one understands and when I try to explain it, the conversation turns into about them and what and how the feel. Sad 😭 all the time. It’s like I don’t know these cold selfish people anymore. I have no one to turn to or get help from. I think I need to leave my wife it’s getting nasty.

posted June 24, 2018
A MyLupusTeam Member

Sorry you are dealing with this on top of your illness. I had to leave my ex, no support of love there. I am happier now, love yourself enough to do what you need to do. We already have a lot to deal with, the added stress is a killer. ((Hugs))

posted June 25, 2018
A MyLupusTeam Member

I feel you my husband was total jerk seemed like he had no empathy I had fallen into depression but something inside me snapped so I had an honest talk with my husband and told him he either step up or leave because with my illness I couldn't deal with extra bs and he did step up.Another thing that helped too was individual and marital therapy

posted June 25, 2018
A MyLupusTeam Member

I’m currently going through this pain. My husband and I are separated he became a very different person after my diagnosis. He became controlling insecure and mean accusing me of cheating and other things. I’m sorry that you are going through this. I’m going to therapy and learning to love me and learning to live with my illness . I’m sending you hugs and prayers.

posted June 27, 2018
A MyLupusTeam Member

I think your husband needs to step up and be a man! Better or worse sickness and in health. I'm in a relationship with my fiance with lupus and I am still learning how to help her with everything. She has my full support

posted January 29, 2019
A MyLupusTeam Member

My wife doesn’t really understand or want to I’ve tried to explain so many times I still do 10hrs a day in the building construction and I’m dead and in horrible pain when I get home I’m not asking for sympathy just understanding at times I feel like pulling the plug on life as what is there to live for
There’s no support groups here in Western Australia so like yoda says
Alone I am.

posted October 16, 2019

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